I ended up in again this week but diabetes stable, not needing much novorapid 🙂 had diabetes bloods n retinopathy which went okay.

Though whilst in the consultant on call whom I used to work with, mentioned all my admissions in the past month alone. 9 now since Christmas 😦 so he suggested I contact my cons secretary to bring my appt forward. So I emailed Gail Carr then rung her at 4pm yesterday to request an appt n why n waiting for her to get bk to me. Feeling okay today but no sleep again overnight 😦 tossing n turning all night. Gotta pick up my dosset box n Dai’s psych meds from hospital today then come home to do some colouring.

i entered the Millie colouring competition on the fb page. Voting starts today. Hope they like what I did. Colouring is very therapeutic n good distraction 🙂

oh, my best friend of 11 years is getting married next March n has asked me to sign the register 🙂 I am so honoured. colour scheme is red wine/ burgundy.

That’s it for now. Hugs to all xxx


Diabetes continues to be a problem with having another hypo yesterday n today they are high – can’t win either way 😦 spoken to diabetic nurse bout the high bm who said to give 6-8U novorapid then recheck then another lot of novorapid If needed. She was surprised bout me having hypos so need to be really careful…
They were 23 now 27.1 mmol so drinking plain water n will keep an eye on it

Asthma wise am on 4hrly nebs now so that’s an improvement but continue to cough lots, twice to the point where I have passed out
fitting 😦 got asthma nurse review tomorrow at 4:20 n prevena injection too which covers me for 15 types of pneumococcal virus …

Time to vent

Time to vent

Well as if asthma kicking off coz of sepsis weren’t enough, now diabetes decides to start acting up as well. Started off yesterday being stable but today who knows … must be another infection maybe?? Started as 16 mmol this morning which is high for me but by lunch was 29.2 mmol, I was sweating profusely n had a temp. Rung ooh who said to go AnE but as u all know I was only discharged (self) last weds n finished my abx this morning… so I held off, took my lunchtime 10U novomix then 14U novorapid to correct the level n stuck to drinking plain water… it’s never been that high!! Every 30-45 mins I rechecked my bm n now at 5:35pm it’s 9.0 mmol …. phew!!

Thanks to Sarah walker for being a star n teaching me bout diabetes monitoring n what to do when this happens. Hypos are so much easier to manage!

So I ain’t convinced infection has gone but we will see what my sugars are later and tomorrow …



Well as u know I self discharged on weds evening. I had my reasons. I am physically n emotionally drained n these damn bad thoughts n voices won’t gimme a break. Thursday I contacted my CPN n went to pick up my meds from him in person n I explained my struggles to him. He said I needed counselling but both agreed I didn’t need a psych admission or change of meds (recently increased). Friday I heard from him. I can’t have counselling with the centre as the woman is doing therapy with hubby n no one else available n he admitted he wasn’t qualified to help me but to seek crisis team or GP if I felt the need for admission… I don’t – yet. I ain’t suicidal n haven’t self harmed.
After speaking to him on the phone I picked up my other meds from chemist – weekly dosset box – and bought new shoes 👠 to cheer myself up. We then had a taxi home as I was struggling in the heat with my chest but managing without need to go in.
Been texting Samaritans thru the night n found them to be very helpful in offering support so at least that’s something I guess. But I still feel really low n anxious all the time. Went to bed at 2am n woke gasping for breath just before 4am so immediately set up a neb, still nebbing. This weather of thunder n lightning n rain is making lungs even more grumpy, that makes me grumpy n tired too 😦
Oh well, time to have a cuppa after this neb as I can’t see me sleeping anytime soon, can you?


Christening on Sunday was amazing! The ceremony was short n sweet n the refreshments after n food was yummy! He looked so adorable!!

Mon I didn’t feel right. Mon pm I ended up, u guess it right, back in AnE where she said I looked unwell n sweating profusely. Sats etc were fine. But was tachycardic 134/min. I was quickly taken to majors n seen straight away n moved to resus. Temp 38. I was septic. I had iv magnesium n fluids along with iv abx. Nebs continued. I was kept in resus on a trolley thru out the night till a bed available on admissions unit the following morning, 11am yesterday. During the night, a woman, 85, was brought in being resuscitated. I cud hear it all. That’s when the voices started 😦 she died.

On the ward, i continued on my usual meds, got changed to oral abx n plenty nebs then transferred where resp team were – another ward yesterday evening. The staff were amazing n last night I slept waking just once. Then awake at 5:30 for obs n nebs, struggling a bit but did b2b from 7. Again I had my voices. I had more iv mag then nebs regularly. My parents visited this pm n I broke down. Dad working days Thursday n Friday then nights on bank holiday weekend so I wud not b home till Tuesday – 5th anniversary of losing Taylor Shae, so last place I wanna be is near a hospital.

I spoke to my parents crying. Mum knew why straightaway. I went to my nurse with my heightened anxiety n explained I needed to go home. I saw the dr n had to self discharge myself. Peak flow 420 n obs stable. I am sorry but I didn’t know what else to do. They gimme abx to continue for 5 days n said they needed to ring my GP to let them know I had gone home, new protocol. That’s fine by me. So I expect a phone call tomorrow …


well … got readmitted weds into resus with hr 154 n pf 170. Personal best 550. Had iv mag hydro amino n fluids despite the admitting dr staying he thought amino had a placebo effect?? Wtf like got cardiac monitored until fri when I was told I was allowed home 🙂

fri pm was managing 3 hourly then 2 hrly by night. Same yesterday. But tonight I just can’t settle. It’s 04.25 am n had 6 nebs since 10pm n just can’t switch off. Think it’s all the excitement for Blakes big day tomorrow (Sunday) he is being christened. That’s y I needed to get home fri or I be in the weekend n miss it 😦

anyways, having a neb now yet again then gonna try get some sleep. At least an hr n I be happy as due nebs again at 6 :/ let u know how christening goes


Well I got discharged Thursday morning with peak flow >400 n sats okay etc. Cons said it was an acute severe/ Partial life threatening attack n I am to do 2hrly nebs strictly n stay on 60mg lovely pred till see asthma nurse next Thursday…

Fri night I started coughing more n green phlegm with pain in shoulder so sat am I rung ooh who saw me n readmitted me with chest infection, to my local hospital where my cons is. They did ecg X-ray bloods for clots as well as usual bloods n gimme hydro n mag. They discharged me this morning with peak flow 410 n all obs okay limits n abx. Started azithro from home as well till I speak to Gp tomorrow. Gotta continue the beloved pred 60mg till thurs at least.
Done 3 hrly nebs overnight n feeling much better today

Doing nothing this week until Thursday tho I got diabetic clinic on Tuesday, they adding in short acting insulin novo rapid to my treatment